Dan Harmon: I want to communicate. I'm going to step forward holding my hands in a non violent manner and I say, "Guys you are us, we are you. That means you don't want to do this either. Let's not do it together and we'll have twice as much a chance at that working. Of that working. You're probably drunk too a couple articles and prepositions aren't going to bug you. I wait for your answer take all the time you want." I step back.
Spencer: In unison the four draw their weapons.
Dan Harmon: You’re a fucking dick, Spencer! And you were born a dick and you’re gonna die a dick! You’re vindictive and you’re petty. This is why people don’t like Dungeons and Dragons! They think of nerds as being these people with all this anger welling inside them and they take it out on dice and things or they...Maybe we should go out on a football field and fuck each other up! If that's what you want! If you like pain! If you like discomfort LET'S GO PLAY FOOTBALL! You know this is supposed to be about fun! I don't wanna die! It's Mother's Day! She loves season four [of Community] If I die she won't even care! She won't notice! She was quoting lines I wasn't even there! She won't notice! She only knows I exist because of the fucking television and she's going, "Oh that was a good one!"
The Oscar Dream
I barely have time to write this down, let alone edit it for clarity or easy reading. It’s a dream. You know what you’re getting into if you start reading a description of someone’s dream. No refunds. I am contacted by someone producing the Oscars the day before the telecast asking if I’d like to perform as a guest co-host. I am thrilled by the prospect and certain...
Channel 101's Top 5 Finishers Are Up For March →
thecomedybureau: 1. Baby Mentalist 2. Car-Jumper 3. Actress 4. Karate P.I. 5. Cat Lands If you’re not familiar with this and have no idea what the list above means, then click on the link and please introduce yourself and get addicted to Dan Harmon and Rob Schrab’s March Madness for short form TV, Channel 101.
It turns out procrastination is not typically a function of laziness, apathy or...– David Cain, “Procrastination Is Not Laziness” (via pawneeparksdepartment) This totally justifies every excuse I’ve been giving myself from not doing that thing I’m supposed to do. (via aaronmoles)
I'm am SO on board with COMMUNITY 2.0
okolivertrask: Dan Harmon isn’t around to say stupid shit regularly and make me hate the show in different ways I hadn’t even imagined before It’s not quality quality like COMMUNITY season 1 and 2, but it’s also not a sanctimonious self-indulgent mess like season 3. It is just a fun cartoon-version of a once great show. It’s like really good fanfiction. And I know that sounds like an insult...
Mister Tumbles: The Dungeon Master and the Story... →
winrosenfeld: I’ve spent the last few weeks all over the country, and often in a few places simultaneously. When I was in Park City, I was in Somerville. When I was in Fort Lauderdale, I was in Denver. To be fair, when I was in Brooklyn, I was in Brooklyn - but I was always in Harmontown. Harmontown…
Jeff: What do you think Hitler did right?
Dan Harmon Sports Corner
Jeff: So Dan what do you think about the Steelers this season?
Dan: Jeff if I've said it again, I'll say it a thousand times. Yardage Yardage Yardage.
Dan: You know you've got Clue Quintro on the tight end and he's doing great but he needs to be paired with Hodgkins.
Jeff: We talk about tight-ends vs this. What do you think the role of a tight-end really is in an offense?
Dan: Well first and foremost, and people won't agree with this, he's got to back up the line-backer. He's gotta be there for em. And he's got to keep icing his knee. And he's got to be there to receive. If the receiver fails then the tight end has to back up the linebacker when the quarterbacker throws those missiles as all I call em, especially with the Steelers you know you've got hodgkins on quarterbacker. Either your icing your knee or you're catching that ball.
Jeff: What's your opinion about the Steeler's secon....secondary...yeah.
Dan: I think it's a bunch of trumped up stuff. I think it's ruined the game for the fans.
Jeff: You think there should be no secondary?
Dan: Yeah I think it's a myth. Look we're familiar with the first quarter in football. Ummm we love the third quarter. But...ya know there's 4 quarters to a game. Why do you need to say secondary. It's uh...it's stupid. It's a foregone conclusion. Break it into two halves. Ya know?
Jeff: So who do you like between The Falcons and the 49ers?
Dan: Schmitty. Stomplee.
Jeff: The game was played today so what do you take away from the uh Falcons and the 49s.
Dan: Hate to sound like a broken record...yardage. You know? But you gotta keep that ball moving down the field.
Jeff: Who did you favor going into tonight's game?
Dan: at the top of the game I would have told you Scrinfrab.
Jeff: No I mean the team.
Dan: Oh. Under Scrifrab's leadership as a coach that they would have gone against the 49ers and have taken away the golden...
Jeff: You had the Falcons favored going in?
Dan: Falcons? What?
Jeff: Falcons and 9ers.
Dan: Definitely 9ers.
Jeff: You had them favored going into the game?
Dan: Yeah. yeah.
Jeff: So how do you feel about the outcome?
Dan: well I think the Steelers did poorly.
Jeff: They certainly did. They proved that games ago.